instead of calling your partner ‘babe’ or ‘baby’, try using one of these unique pet names:

  • munge bimp
  • drippy spaff
  • vibrating munt
  • fudd dunker
  • bodge
  • peef rimgar
  • gog noggler
  • nandy rewman
  • smear aroma
  • terry




ads for pads these days are all about how thin and discreet pads are and how no one will ever be tell you’re wearing them wELL HOW ABOUT YOU MAKE THE PACKAGING QUIETER BECAUSE THERE’S NO FUCKING POINT IN HAVING A THIN DISCREET PAD WHEN EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU RIPPING ONE OPEN IN THE SCHOOL BATHROOM

Use the men’s room they won’t expect it

'Who the fuck is eating chips in here?'


life’s hard when ur headphones only work in one fucked up position